Monday, December 29, 2008

Not me monday late

I did not feed my christmas tree to my goats today.

I did not in fact, encourage my daughter to leave home tonight while she was packing to run away tomorrow. I did not praise her for remembering to pack her own washing machine and I did not remind her during story time that this was her last night to hear stories bc tomorrow night she most certainly will not be sleeping on the high prairie.

My mother and I did not not rearrange the entire living room because we most certainly do not feel that we sit around in the winter doing nothing.

I did not forget to post my not me monday and I am not posting it at 9 pm, my internet is just super slow.

We did not go looking for our lost dog the 2nd day in a row without success.

I am still anxiously awaiting the sound of my husbands voice on the phone and checking email several times a day for him. I am still marking off days and we have only 9.5 mo left until he is home again.

Sunday, December 28, 2008

Some make you laugh

And then some, well they make you cry. Frank was on video chat for our christmas which we did on the 27th due to my mom working on x mas day and traveling the day after. This is me and Frank, mom took pictures.

He was making funny faces and I laughed, though now they make me cry. We dont know why the image superimposed on top of his but it pleased me.

He does make me laugh...

If you look closely, you can see Tads face to the right and slightly above the image of daddy.

This is John, my brother in law, showing Frank his home brewing kit for beer!

Tad and Nathalie both showing daddy their gifts.

Frank watching us, I am also watching him. I dont think I was very present here, I was very interesting in seeing his face, his hands, his smile. And while we couldnt hear each other clearly, I heard him laugh 3 times and each time it made my heart race remembering how much I love to hear him laugh.

Thursday, December 25, 2008

Merry Christmas!

Merry christmas to all, most especially my husband. Have a wonderful christmas all. My sister is her with her husband, and my mom will arrive on friday night. We are having christmas on saturday morning, and though I havent had christmas without my husband in 10 yrs, I will be happy...

Monday, December 22, 2008


"Nathalie you didnt eat the noodles or the lettuce. You just ate sauce and veggies." Nathalies plate once again has noodles picked clean of sauce and veggies and she ate the cucumbers, tomatoes and carrots OFF of her lettuce.

"Well I ate some of the noodles." Nathalie

"Yeah the ones that accidently got onto your fork." Tad says, and we laugh. Which is amazing to him as he is not traditionally funny so he begins to laugh and laughs long after its done being funny...

Later on my way to the shower I observe that there is quite a mess in the living room, mostly paper, glue, bits of tape, scrapbook letters and many homemade 3 D art pieces of Nathalies. So I ask her, "Nathalie are you going to be making more mess in here or is this amount going to be maintained?" Because I know she probably wont be cleaning it up until asked...

She looks confused and says, "Whats maintained?" So I explain and then ask again if it is going to be messier when I come out. She thinks for a moment and then points to a laundry basket full of more mess (in my humble opinion) and says, "Well I was going to spread out the mess in there too, in a minute." Great.

NOT Me Monday

I did not just stir my coffee with the handle end of a dirty spoon bc there are loads of clean dishes in my house. This wasnt the last "clean" handle available.

We did not again eat waffles for dinner last night bc that would be poor parenting.

I am not just now wrapping my childrens presents.

I am not just now finishing my sisters christmas present because I plan ahead.

I have not decided that my mother will have to have post christmas pajama pants because I already made these in preparation.

I did not lay in bed 1 extra hour this morning rather than going outside in 3 deg to milk goats.

I did not find 2 empty feed bags this morning which were yesterday FULL because no marauding wild animals would break into my well-locked feed barn!

My children are not wearing the same thing they wore out of their last shower, still 2 days later and I am MOST CERTAINLY not wearing the same union suit I was wearing for the last not me monday... And I certainly did wash it! But if I hadnt it is wool and thats antimicrobial and I do wear clean unders under it daily so it wouldnt matter if I hadnt washed it... Oh and I am NOT going to wear this union suit all day even though its so warm!

I will not be cleaning my house into some boxes that will be stored under my bed until after holidays in order to have a neat looking house for my extended visiting family.

Oh, and I am still missing my wonderful husband every second of every day and dreaming of him all night every night, and I am still waiting with baited breath for the moment when I can see him again and be in his arms and I am still thanking God daily that he allowed me to be with such an amazing man so that I have him to miss because I would rather hurt from missing than not have him.

Sunday, December 21, 2008

God the con

We bought frank a video camera for christmas. The children and I and Franks brother Jacob and wife Tristin. I sent it out to him day after thanksgiving. Then a few days later I sent a drill and a jigsaw to him. Packages sent after this date arrived to him in a timely manner, however these 3 packages didnt. I insured them, but insurance only covers the pkg until it leaves the US. (The PO doesnt tell you this of course...) At any rate, 3 mornings ago I prayed and asked God to please let him get his packages. I knew at this point he more than likely wouldnt as the other pkgs had arrived, I considered these 3 stolen.

I promised God however, as I knew he could redirect stolen items, that if the pkgs arrived I would stop biting the little dry edges of my fingers. This is a habit my husband hates because it tears up my hands, looks awful and makes them bleed and hurt. As it happens, this last wk had been stressful and they looked like they had gone through a meat grinder... Literally 3 mornings after I had made this promise to God, Frank got all 3 pkgs.

As another point of fact, I get occasional cold sores. I feel them coming on and can ice and prevent them. Well on this morning, I awoke with not 1 but 3 of them! With no warning. I am unable to bite the edges of my fingers with a full blown cold sore bc the salt burns the sore. So not only did God remember my promise and uphold his end of the bargain, he made proper arrangments for the upholding of my part! Now my lip hurts and my fingers are healing and itchy and have dry edges that I wish to bite!

Everyone knows you cant go back on a promise to God. There are verses on this and that aside, he kept his end! Now some will say he would have gotten the packages anyways. I dont care. In my mind, God made sure of it and now I have to keep my promise but I think it was VERY SNEAKY AND CON LIKE OF Him to arrange it thus.

Friday, December 19, 2008

This wk

This is Nathalies homemade bicycle, its a roll of duct tape, orange paper wrapped in duct tape and a 2 wheeled leftover elastic roll thats empty. Her moosy lucy is riding it.

This is a new nightgown I made for Nathalie today, she needed pjs quite a lot. I have another gown to make with some horsie material.

Nathalie eating an icicle in our snow

Tad snacking on some snow, I have had a hard time getting good pictures of him this wk.

The kids setting up the 10 days in Europe game

My camera does a self timer, I wont lie and say the pictures turn out great but its the best way to photo all 3 of us for Frank to see. This is one of our favorite games, it has a global puzzle that we usually use in conjunction.

Tad and Nathalie eating our fall apples and playing in the play house.

This was Nathalies outfit choice, I have been told since then that pink stripes, camo and argyle dont go well together, if you think this is bad, add red boots and a blue wooly! (see previous picture)

Not a lot going on here, just getting ready for christmas and missing daddy...

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Whats up?

I have been gone for several days from here and I am too tired to upload pictures so none for this time. Will try to get some up for daddy in a few hrs, we are loving the snow!

My kids spent most of the day yesterday outside in the snow, I am very glad I found Mich Dray (a coop mod that sells wool) as I own a huge amt of wool and my children own a huge amt of soft wool underclothes and sweaters. Oh and I am glad for Lands end! Their waterproof boots, coats and gloves that are thin and warm down to -10 are wonderful!

It is still snowing though lightly, I dont know much we have. Some people said only 4 inchs, but we had more out here. Maybe bc its the great plains and the wind brought it to us! People in town seem to have less. The goats do not love it. I dont love getting dressed to go out as its a long affair, and no, not bc I strew my things out across the house like union suit, wool socks, hat etc. Once I am out, I thourougly enjoy the cold air, it isnt very windy right now.

We are making bread, making x mas gifts, getting ready for Nana, Aunt Scarlett and Uncle John, oh and Nika (pronounced Neekah) who is residing in Aunt Scarletts belly. His name is Niklas but we have affectionately nicknamed him! This is my sisters first child and as I am a girl, I do get a bit teary with happiness about it.

Today we are going to town hopefully, the roads are pretty bad. I am stopping by the PO to see what the PO lady thinks on the roads. She has lived here her whole life and can tell me (she drives in 13 miles to work) if going to town (6 miles one way) should wait or if its fine. I feel that we are low on alfalfa and I hate to be low on that if we get a bad storm as its what the goats eat right now. So I am on my way to stock up on grains and grass! Oh and coffee for the mama!

Saturday, December 13, 2008


You might be a seamstress...

When your children can name 4 types of elastic.

When your son can pick out the cream colored wide wale ribbing at the fabric store while you stand at the cut counter.

When your childrens favorite game is fabric store (which includes apprehending someone who ROBS the fabric store-as if anyone would...)

When your children can accurately guess the weight per yard of a certain type of fabric.

When your children can tell you which type of stitch to use for a specific garment hem.

When they can tell the difference between resin snap dies and metal snap dies, and use the snap press themselves.

And this is the conversation you may hear from them to me:

Mommy, um, your stitch isnt straight enough on this hem.

Its okay mom, its not perfect but I am sure you will do better next time. Maybe you should pin it before sewing it?

Mom can I borrow a piece of interlock that matches this jersey I am working with?

Words heard between each other:

That isnt going to work unless you cut the neckline a bit bigger.

If you dont start backstitching better your stuff is going to fall apart.

Dont cut from the middle of the fabric! Use the edge, you are being wasteful.

You need to cut along your grainline proper or it wont stretch.

Words not heard here:

Camo and stripes dont go together.

You cant put green ribbing on a pink shirt.

Boys cant use purple fabric in their quilts (fabric stores are heavy on girl fabrics so we make do...)

Thats ugly (though sometimes this would be appropriate, they lean towards supportive)

Dont use 3 prints in one outfit. (who would say this? my mom, my husband... )

You should iron that (wouldnt that be kind of like, um I dont know, brush your hair???)

Thursday, December 11, 2008

moose, semi and more

This is the "trash" I took from my childrens rooms against their will. They of course refer to this stuff as "treasures."

Pictures of them trying to cover the "get rid of" with their bodies

These two pictures are of moosy lucy, Nathalies pet moose that my mom picked up in AK. You may remember than Lucy was abducted once by a marauding dog, and she also lived through a tornado on the 3rd floor! Daddy rescued her shortly afterwards. Here she is listening to x mas music with nathalie and she honestly seems to be enjoying it. I think she is smiling at the camera in the lower picture... I know, I might be bent.

This is Tads semi truck, it has a cab, an inner part that comes out of the trailor and this is where turtle rides. Geico the Gecko (compliments of angela our friend in SC who visited) is the driver and the rhino rides in the back section that hooks on somehow, he is for protection and you can clearly see his revolver in the 1st picture.

Nathalie was sick yesterday morning, she woke me up and was throwing up. It didnt last long, she hadnt felt well during the night but the morning sickness was only a few hours. Mama Nikki in GA, our herbalist, was able to figure out which homeopathic she should take and shortly after she fell asleep for the afternoon and woke up fine. Wouldnt it be nice to "stay home sick" if you are homeschooled? This means mommy full time and a very comfortable couch and your pick of the movies, oh and a brother who was more than happy to clean up when she threw up, both her and the floor while I was out at the barn.

This was the morning before, we had a bit of snow and it was quite cold. I know he is white so its hard to see, this is frankie, Nathalie's snow baby. He has stick arms, pine cone mouth and eyes (tad scouted far and wide for little ones for her) and a carrot nose.
Lastly, while I was trying out some settings on my neat camera, which I am of course well versed on, I took this picture. Yes that was an awful run on sentence but this is MY blog not my english class. I was trying to find the best setting for my lighting but clearly should have cleaned up first. What a mess! And I honestly didnt even notice it until I saw this picture on my computer 2 days later.

You know you live in Ks

When 25 Degrees feels really warm.

When a still day makes you feel uneasy because you are so used to the wind.

When cleaning your face with sandpaper would be more comfortable than going outside with your face uncovered.

You can see everthing for 20+ miles and thats a short sight distance, its pretty hilly here... For Kansas

You can easily use the bathroom in your union suit, because learning that was way more comfortable than NOT wearing a union suit.

The most interesting spam snail mail is the grain and feed.

The mail man doesnt bother coming down your driveway unless you have mail, no need to check if I have any OUTGOING and my driveway IS the road.

Hearing gunshots in the middle of the night tells you what the locals are having for breakfast-squirrel.

Everyone you know outside of Ks thinks you live in a crappy state, WHAT???

When the wind sings you to sleep... this I love.

Monday, December 8, 2008

Not me monday

I have seen this on a friends blog several times and I believe I will tell you a few things I would not do and have not done.

I did not put on clean jeans this morning just to go out to the barn and get goat poop on them.

I did not put the bucket full of fresh clean milk down while I fed the chickens and my goat MOST DEFINATELY did not help herself to the entire 1.5 gallons!

I did not threaten to kill my cat (and mean it) for pooping downstairs again because she isnt pooping in the house daily since frank left.

I did not mark off any of the items from my to make list when they were not made. Because I WOULD not say nevermind people can do without my well made items.

I am not letting my children watch start wars when we should be schooling and I AM NOT drinking yesterdays coffee bc the coffee is gone because I did not forget to add it to my grocery list and definately didnt forget the grocery list at home last time I shopped.

We are not living out of laundry baskets rather than folded laundry in drawers.

I am not haunting my cell phone and email in case my husband calls, oh wait, yeah I am doing that one...

Sunday, December 7, 2008


This evening I walked in on a conversation my children were having, I rather thought it was something it wasnt...

"And Grandaddy, and now Angela!" Nathalie was finishing as I walked in.

"What are you talking about, people who visited us?" Me

"No," says Tad, "We are talking about people who leave us, or have left us recently." Oh how sad I thought, and yet they are being funny about it.

"First mama nikki, then Uncle Jacob and Aunt Tristin." Tad

"Then Daddy, grandaddy and now Angela." Nathalie says, we just dropped off our friend from SC at the airport and this was Angela.

"Next nana will come and aunt scarlett and uncle John and they will leave us also! Poor us..." Nathalie.

"Well, if they left us that means they came to visit us, we can be glad for that and Daddy is coming home quite soon to stay!" Tad

"Um, its not soon." Me

"Yes it is, 2 mo down nearly and only 10 months and 3 days to go before home! Thats sooner than when he left." Tad says, oh the optimism! I am glad they are waiting without misery.

Saturday, December 6, 2008

Tad's Birthday

Tad is trying to tell me why I am doing this wrong... And he is right!

Tads birthday was Dec 5th, we are having his party in a couple of wks but we gave him his presents on his birthday. Angela (friend from SC) made his favorite pumpkin choco chip muffins and our homeschool friends came over. We bought him a unicycle, which he can already ride with minimal wall to hold onto!

He was super excited about his gift, we didnt manage to get the first OH MY GOODNESS look but he is really pleased.

He was inadvertently matched, all black and red with his coat, lined pants (homemade of course...) and boots. Then the unicycle is red and black! This is a wonderful toy for him, as Daddy rides a unicycle now Tad can learn in his absence and they can ride together when Daddy comes home. Tad is also learning juggling and hopes to "best" Frank at that!
Happy birthday Tad! I have loved these 8 yrs and plan to love the next many.

Christmas decorating

My friend angela is in from SC to visit us and helped us with our sad decorations. We bought some at a local store, it will take us a couple of years though to replace all the ones we had before the tornado.

I used the self timer on these pictures and I cant say they are great! I am working on it though... We moved the coffee table and plan on having frank on the computer using video chat on the day we do x mas.

Nathalie waving at daddy.

Tad put the x mas tree stand together, he worked very hard putting the screws into the stand for the tree trunk to sit against.

Monday, December 1, 2008


I was on my way to the shower when I heard the kids in their rooms, they were playing some sort of pilot game which including an air fight.

"Babies, I have been hit! Babies we are taking rain! May day babies, may day!" Nathalie is crying out for help from her babies.

"Bring the rain boys, bring the rain! She has been hit, she is going down. Good job babies!" Apparently Tad is in on using the babies as their battle buddies as well!

Sunday, November 30, 2008


This is our band, Nathalie started it and "made her own guitar" which does not, of course, look like a orange mouldy and hairy squash. She also made a microphone and pick from her orange construction paper. I dont know whats up with the safety glasses.

Nathalies outfit yesterday left a bit to be desired. She had a pink stripe shirt on under the blue wooly shirt, I am not very good at teaching outfit coordination! I just make the clothes and live here...

This is Tads stick sheath, he wears this over his shoulder so that he can quickly pull out his ninja stick when its needed. He made the sheath himself.

This little furry creature was on my porch, I had a lump of unrisen bread (my chi was off) and I stuck it outside on a plate so I didnt have to be reminded of my missing chi. I planned on taking it to the composte in the morning.

Did you know that opossums are the only marsupials native to the United States? Pictures are not great bc they are through the glass.

Saturday, November 29, 2008

More talk

"Mama, my thumb hurts right here when I color." Nathalie holds out her hand to me.

"Thats because you wont stop sucking your thumb, its chapped there."

"Oh, well I guess I will color with my left hand."

"Why dont you just stop sucking your thumb?"

"Oh no, that wont be necessary, I will just become left handed." Oh great, now why doesnt she just suck her left thumb? I mean she hasnt been thumb specific, its just the right one thats chapped. I guess it healing will take longer than her becoming ambidextrous.

Earlier in convo heard here:

"I just lost a sewing pin." Tad is searching the carpeted area.

"Find it." Me

"Its lost." Tad

"I know, but nobody wants to step on it."

"But if they step on it we will know where it is and it wont be lost." Tad says. I now give him a look that says clearly that isnt going to work and he gives me his question eyes.

Thursday, November 27, 2008


"Mama, could Jesus have changed his mind?" Tad

"About what Tad?"

"Dying, dying on the cross to save us from our sins."

"Yes Tad, he could have." My son turns to look at me from the spot where he is laying on the floor listening to Christmas music. He looks at me long and his eyes fill with tears. They dont spill. He looks away.

Its pretty neat when the gift of salvation becomes more than words. I marvel that my near 8 year old just felt it. And on thanksgiving day.

Diaper art

So this is something I am proud of, I am an instant gratification kind of person. So I make diapers quickly, if a diaper takes very long, I wont make it twice. Which is why I dont make 40 $ a diaper and yes, some people do! I make form and function, not fancy. I do feel proud that this one is so pretty. The top picture here is a double layer wool wrap.

This is the fitted diaper, the wool wrap and the topstitched insert. There are tiny leaves all the way around the insert, the sulky thread on this breaks easily so it was 30 min just topstitching that while paying attention for a break. You can see this set in my store on hyenacart,

I ordered some cheap linen drawstring bags in a coop, just because you never know when you might need them. Each child earned 2 of them for turning them all right sides out (they came unturned) and tying off the drawstring ends so we dont lose them. I didnt ask them to do this, it was Tads idea and they had fun. They spent about an hr on it, I bought 50 bags!

These are knits I ordered for diaper outers, knit diapers dont pill up as much as flannel but they are much more expensive because of the knit prices. Some of these are the kids. The spider one at bottom left is for Tad pjs, the horsie knit and octopus knit are for Nathalie's new nightgowns (nowties) and then some are for my new nephew due in april.

Guinea dinner

Tad was speaking about a friend who called him this am from SC.

"Her sister had 2 guinea hens as pets. Their dog ate it."

"What? Why?" Nathalie asks, I was also feeling surprised by this

"I know right? She was well fed!" Says tad, its funny the way he says things so matter of fact. He often says things that are kind of "duh" and Nathalie (like me) is simply stunned and startled by the world and its unexplainable things.

Wednesday, November 26, 2008


Happy thanksgiving, 2 min ago.

Sometimes I feel sorry for myself, having to be without my husband. Tonight I was listening to 3rd day Christmas music and he was singing about an orphan girl in the cold on Christmas because she couldn't go to her family yet. He was singing for HER not those missing her.

So this thanksgiving, I am thankful for the man I married. He is the best man I know. And it is him who is away for the holidays, not me. I am here, where he was, in his home. With his pictures, his hat and his boots. Most of all, his children.

I am thankful for this. Thankful to God for my blessings, for salvation, for my children, my husband, my family.

Thankful to the soldiers who serve away from home on the holidays. I don't think you have days off deployed, even if you are having down time, time spent with a gun at arms reach is not time off. I am grateful to all of them for the chance to be here safe.

Thankful that my children are here safe, not a child soldier, not an orphan, not unloved or neglected.

To my soldier, thank you for being the best man I know. For being a wonderful daddy, an amazing husband, a strong leader and my best friend. I love you.


"Nathalie you need to shower, you kind of smell bad and tomorrow is thanksgiving."

"Oh man, I am clean mama!"

"No you're not. Come on." I walk in to start the shower and she undresses. I know (as I do laundry sometimes) that she only has one pair of solid white panties. Now, I remember a morning, and not this one or yesterday her wearing these, I am sure of this.

"Nathalie," who has wet her bed until a few weeks ago and thus always took off panties at night, "Do you change your panties every day?" Blank stare from her and then,

"Mama, I havent wet the bed. I had one accident at night 4 nights ago."

"What... but you... I mean you really dont... did you not know... I mean, Nathalie! You are supposed to change them each day even if you dont shower every day. You didnt shower night before last?" They shower every other in winter.

"No because I fell asleep remember but I put these clean panties on 4 nights ago when I woke up in my bed wet. "

Oh my. I am flailing about in the sea of single parenthood! Help!

Tuesday, November 25, 2008


Nathalie did this, it is a number puzzle I bought for Frank years ago. Its easier to put it in order from 1-15 which is what Tad was trying to do for days. He is like me where puzzles are concerned, not great... She is like Frank. She once told me that she sees things as pieces of a whole which is why by age of 3 with one thumb in her mouth, she could easily work 50-100 piece puzzles that Tad and I had struggled with during her nap. She told me that I am poor at puzzles because I see a whole picture rather than pieces.
She did this number puzzle backwards after lunch yesterday, just sitting in the floor working while I cleaned up. She brought it to me and set it on the cabinet. Since then Tad has tried again but gave it up and instead went outside to chop wood.